So you know how things stand. Now forget what they think of you. Be satisfied if you can live the rest of your life, however short, as your nature demands. Focus on that, and don't let anything distract you.
- Marcus Aurelius Antoninus, Meditations, Book 8
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Here is what is: there are no answers; there's just settling in with the mystery. That's as good as it gets. Don't let me or anyone else tell you different.
Can you stand before the mystery of consciousness and say you understand it? Can you stand on this wee island in God's Infinite Sea and say you know anything? Can you wake up and truly believe that money, status, material accumulation is a viable substitute for ignoring the mystery of your existence? Can you?
I hope not.
There is always some huckster with an answer. Some carry Bibles, others carry slide rules, still others push dope of one kind or another (politics, religion, tribalism of one stripe or another) that promises answers to the unanswerable.
Ignore them. Get all Amish on their ass and shun them. They are a distraction from just standing in front of the mystery like standing on a hilltop on a windy day: no questions, no doubts, no answers - but alive, complete, no part left out.
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Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him?
You're just another line in the field of time. Me, too, and yet we busy ourselves with things that are handed to us by others instead of fashioning our own way of living 'til we die. We accept the stories of the various tribes we belong to because in doing so we are accepted, it makes us a club member, we are initiates and we receive in return an identity formed out of the same mold used for generations. It works, though, doesn't it? We are not known by who we are but by what we do for money, the part of the nation we come from, the amount of money our parents had, the schools we attended, the god we pray is there.
But what if you chose instead of accepting? what if you lived the rest of your life, however short, as your nature demands? on a hilltop, no part left out?
Dude, you can.
Dude, you must.
The mystery of human consciousness, it's purpose, it's meaning, it's potential is the heartroot deep of your days. It has always been so. It will always be so. The brothers and sisters who builded themselves altars to worship the cave bear in Chauvet, who painted their world on the walls of those caves are the same as you, except you have technology and a longer lifespan, and they had the willingness to stand in front of the mystery and be part of it.
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I cannot believe in religion. I refuse it. Each takes a stab at ordering life and creates bureaucracies of belief instead. I cannot believe in politics. I refuse it. Every movement is corrupted with the first adherent and reduces itself to tribalism. Instead, I have come to believe only in me, just Yoko and me.
Like you, I am a fucked fucker from way back. I am a deeply flawed man. All that I used to know has proved meaningless in the shitstorm I've kicked up as I've made my way to this windy hill. It's not that the words and deeds were without merit, just that the ends I was aiming for proved to be mirages. The more concrete something is, the more likely it is simply ossified thought, a long forgotten temporary solution that outlived its moment and became institutionalized - like marriage, like banking, like a glow-in-the-dark dashboard Jesus.
What is your nature unencumbered by others' expectations?
Anyone who doesn't get it can fuck themselves.
And here is what is: the vast majority of the people walking this earth are oblivious, or in so much pain they can't see or trust the mystery. They want answers and the only answers we, as a species, have been able to come up with wind up reducing the math, in one way or another, to us versus them. It is the very thing that fucks us, keeps us stuck until we take on the responsibility to chose to stand in front of and be part of the unfathomable and unlikely mystery of life on this whore of an island in God's Sea.
Find the wind.
Let nothing distract you.
Enjoy your makings, for who shall bring you to see what comes after?
Your portion is now.
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