Saturday, May 22, 2010

Here, I Am

Here, I am going to piss you off:

"It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all try something."
FDR

For the fucked, and I am numbered among our legions, there is nothing so far away as common sense, nothing so frustrating as its invocation, nothing so crippling as being hectored by the seemingly happy and seemingly accomplished unfucked fuckers of our social orbit to get up and get going.

Fuck you.

Except they are right, and there is nothing so needed to unfuck your life than some common sense.

There is an inverse relationship between your level of fuckedness and how much common sense that not only A) you have, but more importantly B) you are willing to apply.

(Please note that I did not say "willing and able to apply." You have to want to catch the ball before you can catch the ball. You have to be willing before you are able. It is just that basic.)

* * *

So, back to FDR. This was a man who knew fucked. He also knew how to deal with it: action. Part of the fucked life is that we make it a STUCK life, forever going nowhere as fast as we can. The trust in ourselves to decide is leached out of our bones by fear of being even more deeply fucked. I am here to tell you friends that fucked is fucked. No matter how big the dick is.

Fear paralyzes us into believing that God wanted us to walk around holding our ankles. We come to accept the fucked nature of our lives as our due, as the way it is, and slowly, slowly but inexorably we lose sight of the fact that we're fucked and no longer fight against it. Hit this spot in your kingdom of fucked and despair joins with fear and the Twelve Labors of Hercules are a walk in the fucking park compared to what you have to do.

And what, exactly, is that?

You have to give a shit.

You have to learn how to give a shit about yourself, about your life. If you can muster enough desire the difference between where you are and where you want to be will demand that you stagger on. I don't give a fuck whether you meditate, or eat a macro-biotic diet, or take up Mah-Jong to organize your life, but try something - anything - and if it doesn't work admit and try something else.

I will offer this advice: start with the basics. Don't get all esoteric right off the bat. Try taking a pass from sitting on your ass and go for a run, or a walk, or a crawl. It doesn't matter at this point. Do something. The rest will come to you as you learn to move again.

Promise.

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